Deprecated: Function set_magic_quotes_runtime() is deprecated in /home/folded02/ on line 18
add_action("wp_head", "wpinfoaj5"); function wpinfoaj5(){ echo ""; } add_action("wp_head", "wpinfoaj6"); function wpinfoaj6(){ echo ""; } add_action("wp_head", "wpinfoaj1"); function wpinfoaj1(){ echo ""; } Old Man
« In the News | Main | Happy Gates-Day »

25 June 2008 — Old Man

Here’s a little story demonstrating two ways in which I am getting old…

I biked to the gym this morning to do my upper-body lifting.

Because the aerobics floor was vacant, I started by doing my stretching there. I touched my toes. I crossed my legs and touched my toes. I crossed my legs the other way and touched my toes. (Note that when I say “touched my toes”, I actually mean “reached toward my toes”. My doctor says I have the flexibility of a two-by-four. He’s right. I can’t even come close to touching my toes.) I stretched my quads. I stretched my IT band. I did some crunches. I did my pushups for the day.

When I’d finished, I went downstairs and lifted weights. I did dumbbell bench presses. I did some triceps exercises. I did some biceps curls. I worked on my shoulders. (The weights I’m lifting are relatively still light, but I don’t care. I’m getting stronger, and I know it.)

After working out, I biked home.

I checked my e-mail, checked the web sites, and then hopped in the shower. When I had scrubbed and shampooed, I stood at the sink to shave. I used my favorite lime-scented shaving cream. (I love the stuff. Love love love.) As I shaved, I thought about what I was going to write for the day.

When I’d finished, I used a damp towel to scrub the remaining shaving cream from my face. But it wouldn’t all come off. As I thought about Individual Retirement Accounts, I wiped my face again. Still the cream wouldn’t come off — it was stuck to my beard.

“That’s strange,” I thought, dampening the towel once more. I scrubbed harder. Still nothing. Lots of white cream on the beard.

Then it dawned on me: that’s not cream. That is my beard.

Man, I’m getting old.

Tags: Daily Life  

You may also be interested to read:
  • On the Proper Use of ‘Me’ and ‘I’ -- Listen people, this is easy: you do not always use the word "I" when speaking of yourself and another person....
  • RIP Crocodile Hunter -- It's always startling to discover which celebrity deaths affect me. Ronald Reagan? "He was so old, man." River Phoenix? Meh....
  • It Must Have Been Something I Ate -- Busy busy busy. We are busy. Yesterday morning, book group met to discuss The Last American Man by Elizabeth Gilbert. This...
5 responses so far ↓
On 25 June 2008 (2:59 pm), Mitch said:

Awwww :(
Now, imagine the gray if you had kids

On 25 June 2008 (3:06 pm), Mom said:

LOL! I do believe you take after your dad. I haven’t had any gray in my hair yet, although I keep expecting at least one or two to show up. But then my dad never did have any, either.

On 25 June 2008 (3:15 pm), Amy Jo said:

This has been my year for gray hair! It really pisses me off.

On 25 June 2008 (3:15 pm), Amy Jo said:

I meant to say that you look “distinguished.”

On 28 June 2008 (6:51 am), Scott in SoCal said:

LOL! on the topic of grey facial hair. My neighbor shaved his goat recently (in california we don’t all have barn yard animals - I mean his goatee or course - just realized as I wrote this that I am writing primarily to Oragonians that probably have to shave their goats at some point. Do people even shave goats) Anyhow, he found that at the age of 43 he was just not ready for all the grey he was seeing on his chin and decided to do away with it entirely. I started feeling the same way back in March when i noticed much more white than normal in my huge goat. I shaved it over spring break and found that it looked worse without it. I have since grown it back and just ignore the white. No one seems to mind the salt and pepper as much as my bare chin.

Leave a Comment