I used to wear a Jane's Addiction t-shirt that featured an icon of St. Lucy holding up her eyeballs on a plate. I was such a rebel.

The concept of saints — and the associated religious iconography — is so foreign to me. I didn't have any of that when I grew up. Well, I guess the Mormon Church has Joseph Smith, who is essentially a saint for the cause, but that's it. The Mennonites certainly didn't have any similar figures.

I keep waiting for Bush to perform some miracle so that his devotees can proclaim him Saint George.

Are you kidding, GW already has several miracles to his name. First, he managed to convince the American people that we needed to go to war with a third world country, managed to convince people that Saddam Hussein had used WMD's against our troops during that war, ended hostilities and said the job was done and then got even more people killed after the job was done than before it got done. And as an encore he convinced us to vote him into office for the first time!

For my part, being raised in the bosom of Catholicism, I always thought that the 'Procession of Saints' was one of the coolest things about this religion. It's sanctioned dime-store paperback novel fodder, all dressed up in brilliant costumes.

As a child, praying to specific saints for specific needs (e.g., I'm a Girl Scout, I'll pray to the St. Agnes of Rome, the patron saint of Girl Scouts), had gone out of fashion following the progressive doctrine of Vatican II. However, along with the traditional bible stories, I still learned the stories of many saints during Sunday School. And I would argue that learning the stories of different saints is not only a fascinating example of the far-reaching arm of the holy Catholic church (during the middle ages and beyond), but is also akin to learning/reading mythology. The communion of saints is like folklore, and folklore is an integral part of the oral tradition. If you're the Catholic Church, how do you best sell your dogma to people who can't read? With Reality T.V. ... The stories of saints are fraught with sex, violence, alcohol and drug abuse, riches to rags, and we, the commons, eat that stuff up.

On a more learned note, exposing yourself to these stories (like Greek myths or Grimm's Fairy Tales) is a window into a culture different from your own, but the tribulations and trials of the saints are often very similiar ... For example, I chose Christina for my confirmation saint and name in honor of a third-century Roman saint Christina of Bolsena. She was born into a wealthy family, converted, and then wreaked havoc in her dad's house, destroying all his pagan stuff before he had a visiting magistrate kill her (Rasputin-like, it took three tries to kill Christina). What fifteen-year-old doesn't love this story of rebellion? See, there's something in the saintish canon for all of us!

There's something for you, too, J.D.

Perhaps Gertrude of Nivelles, the patron saint of cats? Francis de Sales and Lucy are patron saints of writers ... Or, maybe manuscript-illuminator and champion of the liberal arts, Catherine of Bologna is a good place for you to begin.

Is there a patron saint of evil, death and/or destruction? I want that one!

Dave "No, I feel just fine despite the caffeine induced crazed look" C.